Overwhelmed...

I've been experiencing some medical issues for the past month and half. I've had tenderness in my left side along with feelings of nausea and heartburn. I even had a stint of vomiting at random points during the day. I took two home pregnancy tests and they were both negative...so that ruled out the obvious. I went to the doctor a week ago and they took blood and urine samples. Those tests came back fine and in normal limits. No signs of infections or elevated white blood cell counts. Additionally, the pregnancy test came back NEGATIVE. I was scheduled for a CT Scan later in the week so I was really hoping I would finally get to the bottom of my pains.

Well, in preparation of the CT Scan I had to drink this white stuff that had a citrus taste to it. Oh my...it had to be the worst tasting stuff that I had to drink EVER! If drinking two bottles wasn't enough, I had to drink them within an hour of each other. I was able to get them down after throwing up some of the first and "accidentally" spilling some of the second down the sink. Anyway, I received a call from the nurse the other day with the results from that. Once again, my results were NEGATIVE for anything abnormal. I was a little upset with the results because I was secretly hoping something was wrong so that I would have an explanation. I immediately apologized to the nurse and repented to God for my reaction. It is a blessing to receive good news because trust me had there been bad results I would've been a mess!

So...reflecting over all of that I have come the conclusion that my feelings of discomfort are coming from non other than STRESS. I have been able to isolate times where I feel the most intense feelings and it is ALWAYS when I start thinking about my never ending list of things to do.

I have decided to take the next semester off from graduate school. I quickly arrived to this decision however now that I've made it, it has hit me and now I'm really trippin'! I have always taken pride in the fact that I can take on just about anything and come out on top. I preach to young girls all the time that you face your challenges head on and don't back down. Look at me...I'm backing down. I've shared my decision with my husband, close friends, and family and everyone seems to be in agreement with my decision. I just feel like a cop out. I know people who have juggled more than I currently am and they made it! They worked hard and stuck with it.

I don't know...I'm just a little overwhelmed right now.